Staying Silent
by Somewei
Summary: The silence was deafening, but it was safe to her. Within the dark, deep silence she could wrap up her troubles and not think. Thinking was too dangerous…especially when it was about him…[RaeRob]


**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own the Teen Titans…if I did there would be so many changes to the series and I wouldn't be writing on here!

_**Summary: ** The silence was deafening, but it was safe to her. With the dark, deep silence she could wrap up her troubles and not think. Thinking was too dangerous…especially when it was about him…RaeRob_

**_Author's Notes: _**Okay, this is a RaeRob story that came from Alena-chan's challenge. Her challenge was posted in Chapter 11 of her story, _Casablanca Lilies._ Lemme tell you, trying to figure out a plot was crazy for little one-shot! Anyway, review, no flames and enjoy this one shot! Oh, Raven may seem slightly OOC.

**_Alena-chan's Line for the Challenge:_** '_Silence is safe. That much he/she knew.'_

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**Staying Silent**

_Somewei_

Christmas had passed, but the snow still lingered.

Soft flakes floated gently down to the ground, each flake carrying a different shape. Below, the water was cold, but not frozen and snow has loosened up only slightly around the Titans Tower. Sitting at one of the giant windows of the tower, a lone bird watched as the snow fell. In her small hands was a book on mythology and whatnot and in her other free one was a mug of tea. She preferred it better than hot chocolate. Hot chocolate made people high-strung and that was not what she needed. Her emotions could not take it although the defeat of her father, Trigon, had passed.

The Titans had noticed that Raven was different this past month. She was more reserved and withdrawn than she normally was. She mediated more often and wouldn't even allow Starfire to meditate with her. It was, in fact, Starfire that had noticed that Raven was more withdrawn than usual and pointed this out to her fellow Titans.

Beastboy then noticed that Raven hadn't even commented on his jokes or gave a witty remark about his stupidity. She didn't say anything when he pulled a small prank on her or dramatically teased her for being "creepy". Cyborg even tried to lighten up the normally cynical and dark teen, but his attempts remained futile. Not even a single glare was cast in his or Beastboy's direction when they argued about meat or tofu.

…it was odd.

Eventually Robin had persuaded Beastboy and Cyborg to leave Raven alone and that all would reveal itself in due course. The two actually stopped when their fearless leader requested them too and went back to their usual routine of video games, fighting and pranks - without Raven's commentary, silent or not.

Starfire, however, did not give up nor did she follow Robin's orders. She tried taking Raven out to the "shopping of the mall" but it ended in a disaster with the cashier being blown up and several dresses lost into the oblivion. They ended up having to save the day from some disguised criminals who had planned to rob the store. When they returned home, an angry Raven locked herself up in her room and meditated the day away.

The alien princess tried once more to get Raven to socialize with the world by taking her to the Titans East Tower. Again, it ended in a disaster and Raven refused to go anywhere with Starfire again under threat of destroying the whole tower first. Starfire relented after that scenario.

Raven took in a sharp breath as she continued to watch the snow, forgetting completely about the book resting in her lap. This was the first time she had been out of her room and remained out for more than five minutes. It wasn't late at night nor was it early in the evening. The other Titans were out eating pizza, giving her peace she craved. She didn't go along because she feared of what she might say during the time she spent with the Titans. Speaking was dangerous at this moment and the silence is safe. That much she knew.

The silence was deafening, but it was safe to her. Within the dark, deep silence she could wrap up her troubles and not think. Thinking was too dangerous…especially when it was about him…

Ever since she had learned of his persistence is saving her and doubting that she was dead when her father was brought to this world -their home -she could not be in the same room. She actually found out at Christmas by Starfire herself. Starfire was in overly pleasant mood and drank one too many glasses of wine at the Christmas party they attended (Beastboy tricked her into drinking too many).

When Starfire confessed about what had Robin done, Raven could barely contain her emotions. She knew that Star hadn't meant to make Raven reclusive, but she feared of what she might say to Robin. It was too dangerous. Besides, she had Starfire's feelings to consider. The alien princess had obvious feelings for their masked leader and Raven wasn't going to confront Robin about his actions when the two were having their relationship bloom.

And she couldn't have her own heart ripped out.

The dark empath knew that Robin also cared greatly for Starfire. He had tried so hard to stop Starfire from marrying and went crazy when Starfire was kidnapped for being mistaken as Blackfire. No doubt those two would end up getting together soon. She was surprised that they hadn't already, but Raven figured it was because Robin was concerned about the villains and more importantly Slade.

Raven snapped her book shut and placed it to the side. She wrapped her dark blue cloak around her bare legs and rested her head on her knees. They weren't back yet and she was content with that. The moment they did go back she would have to go back into hiding. Although she enjoyed the dark, she enjoyed spending time with her friends even more.

She did not sacrifice that time with them to defeat her father, be freed from his hell and then go back into the darkness. She fought for her freedom and most importantly her friends. They had become her salvation. She used to be so alone and then she met Robin…

…there she goes again.

Shaking her head, she brushed the thoughts of Robin aside. She couldn't afford to think of Robin _that _way. He was her leader and her best friend. That was it. Nothing more - no matter how much her heart screamed otherwise.

She was torn in two. Her heart was screaming to hold on and maybe something could work out whilst her head was screaming_ let it go, you fool!_ She wanted to let go of her feelings. She wanted to be normal once more and perhaps unfeeling. At least with her emotions withdrawn she didn't have this complex river of emotions surging through her every moment of her life.

Leaning back against the wall of the window frame, she sighed heavily. Who was she kidding? She knew she had feelings for him. She had come to trust him as a friend and eventually trust him as something more. She had theorized she had fallen in love with him sometime before they had the knowledge of the prophecy, but she had come to _known_ she was in love with him when he promised to help her with her father, even if it cost him his life.

Oh Azar…how foolish could she have been. She had done the thing she wished she hadn't done.

She had been in love before…or at least she thought she did. Malchior had managed to sweep her off her feet (no matter how corny that sounded at the time) and in the end he abused her feelings. Maybe that was why she chose to remain silent. She thought that if she spoke her feelings like before she would be hurt, abused and eventually cast aside. Something told her that Robin wouldn't do that, but she was Raven and she was cautious. Silence was her only option to protect herself. The silence was her safeguard.

Raven glanced outside once more to see the T-car being parked into the Titan's garage. Sighing and grabbing her book, she headed for her room. Time to be a recluse once more. As she entered her room, she could hear the laughs of Starfire and Beastboy and it pained her. She wished she could be there. Nevertheless, she had to protect herself.

The door to her room slammed shut and Raven immediately placed herself in her lotus position in the middle of the room. Meditation passed the time by, it made the slow days seem quicker. She could lock herself up in her thoughts. As she was about to slip into her own mind, a soft knock was heard. Snapping her eyes open, she glanced towards the door.

"Raven…?"

It was him. He was at the door and she could say nothing. Of course, he knew she was there. She remained in her silence and in her lotus position. Maybe if she was absolutely still, he would take the hint and leave. Fate was not her side.

"Raven…I know you're there." He said. She sighed and cringed inside when she heard the door slide open. Robin walked into the room. He was not in his normal uniform. A simple pair of jeans and a black shirt replaced the walking traffic light outfit (as Raven dubbed it). She glanced up at him.

"What?" She snapped. Remain short and to the point.

"Brought you some food…your favorite, of course," He said. An awkward silence filled the room as Robin shifted uneasily from one foot to the other. Raven rose an eyebrow as he placed the food next to her. The food was not the only reason why he was here.

"What are you doing here?" She asked curtly. Good girl…remain to the point.

"Well…" he paused briefly, glanced at her quickly and then back to the food on the floor, "…the others, I know, are concerned for you and…"

"Cut the crap, Robin." Raven said.

Robin sighed heavily, "Rae, why are you in here? There's no reason for you to lock yourself up in your room. Your father has been defeated and no one is going to attack you or use you if you come out and have a little bit of fun with your friends. Why are you so silent?"

Raven cringed. She was afraid he ask that. Of course, she knew that it would come, but she hoped he would wait a little longer…at least until she made up an excuse. She, however, used her same line she always used with Beastboy, "I don't do fun…"

"Rae, you know I don't believe you."

Once again, she winced. Why did she have to share a bond with him of all people. Why not Starfire? Or Cyborg? Hell, even a bond with Beastboy would do at a time like this. Wait…Beastboy would just abuse the bond. Nevermind about that thought…

"_Raven_." Robin pressed. Raven got up from her lotus position and walked to her bookshelf, trying to avoid the penetrating stare of her leader. Remain silent, she reminded herself. But it was becoming harder to complete that task with each passing second he was around. She felt something in the back of her mind and knew he was trying to sense her emotions. He had become surprisingly good with using their bond as of late. Damn her for trusting him. She should have known he would pick up quicker than the others on how to use their bond. At least with the others it would take them a couple of years before they caught on. No, he had picked up in a couple of months. Again, she was foolish for underestimating him.

"Stop trying to read my mind, Robin." She said sharply. Robin let out a frustrated growl.

"What am I supposed to do when you're not talking to me!" He exclaimed. He walked up to her, grabbed her by the arms and whirled her around so she was facing him. If she could see his eyes, she knew they would be looking at her pleadingly. Softly, he whispered, "Rae…talk to me."

She hated irony. He was asking her to do the very thing she couldn't do. Looking down to the ground, she said, "No."

She tried pushing passed him, but he held her firmly in his grasp. She wasn't going to get away easily. "I'm not letting you go unless you start talking to me."

Raven glared at him, "Then you're going to be here for a very long time."

Robin sighed heavily, glanced down at the floor and then released her from his grasp. She pushed passed him and was going to go back into her lotus position when she heard him faintly say to her, "Did I make you angry? You used to talk to me. Have I done something to anger you?"

She stopped walking, her back facing towards him. "No."

"Have I hurt you in any way?"

She faltered. Yes you did… "No."

"Did I say something to you to shut you up?"

"No."

"Did I forgot something important like your birthday?"

Once again, she recoiled. She hated her birthday, "No."

"Then what did I do?" He exclaimed, frustrated. Raven shook her head.

"Nothing!"

"Then tell me why you aren't talking to me!"

"I can't!" She half yelled. She was getting desperate. She was going to explode any moment now and she knew he wasn't going to quit until she practically shouted it to the world.

"Why!"

"Because…"

"That's not a reason, Raven. Why aren't you talking to me!"

"What do you want me to say!" She yelled. "That I can't talk to you because I'm afraid!"

It was then that everything stopped. Had she said that out loud? She didn't mean to, she knew, but he wouldn't stop. She covered her mouth with her hand, grateful that her back was facing him instead of her front. She could tell Robin stopped moving and closed her eyes when he whispered, "Afraid…of what?"

She knew there was no escape now, "Afraid of being hurt."

He walked up to her silently and then gently placed his hands on her shoulders. He turned her around and then hugged her. She buried her face in his chest and took in his smell. She cracked a small smile when she noted he smelled like the ocean. He stared stroking her hair softly when he said, "Why? Did I do something?"

"No…" she murmured into his chest. "You didn't. You're fine…perfect, in fact."

"Then what?" He questioned.

She couldn't say it. She couldn't say she loved him. She couldn't tell him. It would ruin everything. "I love you…"

She said it in the smallest voice possible, hoping against all hope that he hadn't heard what she said. She hoped that her voice was so muffled against his chest that he hadn't heard her, but he heard and she knew it too. He pulled her away and looked straight into her eyes, "What did you just say."

Tears brimmed her eyes. She hated crying and it killed her even more that it was over a boy. "I said that I love you…" It all started pouring after that. She couldn't stop herself. "…Robin, I'm afraid of loving you because I'm afraid I'm going to get hurt. I was afraid of talking because I was afraid I was going to tell you about what I felt. I knew that you cared for Starfire more than me, but - "

He placed a finger over her lips, a small smile on his lips, "Slow down, Rae…"

She took in a sharp breath. Had he not heard what she said? By this time she could feel the hot tears rolling down her cheeks. Had she said something that he had not heard? He brushed the tears away from her eyes and chuckled lightly, "I heard what you said, Rae, and yes, I love you too."

Her eyes widened. He loved her? But what about Starfire?

As if reading her mind, he laughed lightly once more and said softly, "Sister/brother relationship, that's all. I care for her, yes, but only as a brother and her feelings are mutual as well. However, she _does _have this thing for Speedy…"

He didn't finish his sentence because as soon she heard his answer, she threw herself on him and pressed her lips against his. Robin was caught off guard at first, before realizing that Raven had her lips against his. Raven, also realizing what she was doing, pulled back, her cheeks red. Damn emotions…making her more emotional than she should be. Robin laughed and pressed his forehead against her. "No need to be embarrassed."

With that, he brushed his lips lightly against hers. Slowly wrapping her arms around his neck as he slowly wrapped his arms around her small waist, she smiled into the blissful kiss. Just as the kiss became more passionate, Robin slightly pulled away, "Raven…?"

"Hmm?" She asked, her nose touching his and her eyes still closed from the kiss.

"I love you."

She smiled, kissed him lightly and then said, "I love you too, Robin."

…staying silent was overrated.

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**_Author's Notes:_**

Okay, everyone, that's my one-shot. Short, yes, but this was my first Teen Titans fanfic! Anyway, review everyone and **NO FLAMES**! As Cyborg would say, "Thanks y'all!" Lol!

_Somewei_

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"_One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love."  
_-Sophocles


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